one minute you're high
the next, in the depths of the waters buried under the surface below
nice to meet you
it's part of being a physical being, as you know
our human reality is full of polarities
the happy days
the sad days
so every day, no matter which edge of the spectrum we touch, we try to search for ways to feel a little less disconnected
and a little more in tune
this desirable concept of balance
in yoga class, balance is highlighted by our teacher as we hold our weight on one leg for minutes at a time so we can mentally stay steady in the challenge our physical body is experiencing.
in society, balance is glamorized by our friends, family, co-workers, teachers, and others wearing different lenses of perception who hold exceptions and share stories about us -- which often confuses or overwhelms us with the contrast in their noise.
in relationships, we want to feed our friends, family, partners, hobbies, and work with all our love and undivided attention, but in reality, everyone only has enough time and energy to receive a piece.
to give a piece.
so how do we create equilibrium between all dichotomies?
no one should be expected to hold their standards that high.
no one should be expected to find impeccable balance in all areas of their lives.
and especially, no one should expect that of themselves
because that's what creates disharmony
trickling to create feelings, such as guilt, shame, sadness, isolation, and unease.
so... how do we find balance that won't make us reach for perfect?
if balance is defined as "having an even distribution of weight enabling someone or something to remain upright and steady."
it's not about balancing our time and attention on everyone and everything
being able to force ourselves to remain in one position when things become too challenging or uncomfortable.
we find the most balance when we bring the fluctuations of our emotions under conscious control and have compassion for ourselves if we can't meet it all perfectly.
balance is finding an even-mindedness and ease when we're faced with any polarity.
when you're experiencing overwhelming emotions
or you don't know how to equalize the scale within your relationships
or within yourself
these simple tools may help...
here are some ways to help you find balance with whatever life hands you:
- stepping outside of yourself in this situation. look from a bird's eye view. detaching from the emotions. as if you're the audience member of a movie. or you're the friend helping a friend (aka yourself). what do you see in the big picture? what advice would you give?
- if you're feeling something is too extreme for you... perhaps, it is. scale back a bit. if a diet isn't suiting you, then perhaps, only eat one or two meals of that food a day. or if you're spending too much time with your work and not enough with relationships... it's okay to allow yourself one day of rest and play. (even if that means you need to fake sick -- yes... this is for your soul which matters more than any matter of business).
- practice non-reactivity, by taking many deep breaths -- which naturally shifts your perceptive as you come back to the present moment with a clearer mind
- and above all... be compassionate with yourself, because there is not one superhuman who can handle it all.
- connect with a human that gets you, yet can see from unbias perceptive. even if their advice isn't accurate, it's just nice to be heard and to release the disharmony inside.
FINDING BALANCE MANTRAS
"i'm aware i have the ability to do anything... but not everything"
"life is a balance of holding on and letting go"